Classic Dicks in the Canon

One of the most frequent – and most valid – arguments against the contemporary relevance of classical art forms like opera and ballet is their heroine problem. Misogyny is an unfortunate and unavoidable conclusion when the canon is littered with stories whose female characters are subjected to the virgin/whore binary and who usually end up dying for love regardless of in which category they are placed.

But then I watched the Met’s stream of Norma – a bel canto exception filled with strong, complicated women. In that opera, Pollione, the male romantic lead, starts out as one of the most obnoxious men in theater, a real dick. But he repents and redeems himself with an act usually reserved for the soprano – dying for love. His character development is so unusual that it got me thinking about men in opera. Women might get short shrift, but men aren’t portrayed very nicely either. Normalizing their bad behavior is another facet of misogyny, but the fact remains – if you believe the classics, men are just dicks.

Siegfried in Swan Lake

I have to start with ballet because Siegfried in Swan Lake is the most annoying dick in the canon. He’s established as a playboy right away when his mother reminds him of his duty to marry and he runs off to the woods to go hunting. There he meets Odette, a woman cursed to live as a swan, and they fall in love. So far, so good. But then Odile, her dark doppelganger and daughter to the sorcerer who cursed Odette, shows up to his birthday party and “tricks him” into thinking she’s Odette.

This is ridiculous. No one mistakes a black swan for a white one, and even though the same dancer portrays both characters, their choreography is unmistakably different. The two women are totally different! Siegfried simply doesn’t have the attention span to maintain a relationship beyond a couple of hours. He publicly betroths the wrong swanwoman, dooming Odette to an eternity in feathers. In some versions he drops dead from regret, in others merely collapses in sorrow. Either way, the hero of Swan Lake is still a dick.

Albrecht in Giselle

Albrecht in Giselle is such a dick. He uses the old “pretend to be a humble youth” to earn a poor girl’s trust trick. Here’s the plot: Albrecht is a lord in the prince’s court, but he even has a cottage in the village so that Giselle won’t know that there’s no way he would marry her. When his deception is revealed, she (naturally) dies from the shock. Albrecht feels kind of bad about it and gets weepy at her gravestone, where he’s almost killed by the Wilis. Giselle’s ghost protects him. So he kills her and she saves him. Then the next day he marries a noblewoman.

Don Giovanni

Don Giovanni, Mozart’s bad boy is probably the first opera dick that comes to mind. Except he’s not so much a bad boy as a serial rapist, who keeps a record of his conquests. Actually, Don Giovanni is not a classic dick, he’s just a villain.

Captain Daland in The Flying Dutchman

I’m sure you expected me to say the title character of the Flying Dutchman, who has apparently been killing a bride every seven years for centuries. But desperate times call for desperate measures, and after all, the Dutchman just wants to be loved – is that so wrong?

Captain Daland on the other hand, meets a stranger at sea, gets drunk, and promises his daughter to the unusual and obviously mental man. He doesn’t know the man’s name, but he does know he’s an exile for undisclosed reasons. But he’s got a lot of money and wine, so why not link your only daughter to him for life without a background check or, you know, introducing her to him first? Why, because he seems to have a lot of money. Dick.

Eugene Onegin

The title dick to this Russian opera is one of my favorites because he gets such sweet just desserts. Jaded urban sophisticate Eugene wows inexperienced, sincere country girl Tatyana. When she confesses her feelings, he coldly and condescendingly shoots her down. As he himself points out, he could have taken advantage of her – that dick! – but he settles for humiliating her instead. Then, bored and in a snit, he picks a fight with his best friend and kills him in a duel and has to flee the country.

Years later he returns to Russia only to discover that Tatyana has filled out and come into her own as the elegant wife of his own more powerful relative. Now he wants her, and regardless of all that she stands to lose by engaging in an affair, he pursues her. But she won’t play. Singing the same melody from his rejection and using almost his own word, she flatly turns him down.

Duke of Mantua in Rigoletto

Story mechanics identify the Duke of Mantua in Rigoletto (one of my favorite operas that I’ve watched multiple times) as another villain. But he is such a dick about it. He is the shallow portrait of privilege, amusing himself with others’ suffering and relishing the chase as much as the catch in his pursuit of a never-ending string of random women. He’s another example of the “pretend to be a poor young student so she thinks you might actually marry her” trope. Ironically, his most famous aria – in fact one of the most famous arias of all time – is about how fickle women are.

Don Jose in Carmen

The music in Carmen is exquisite, and you can understand why Carmen fell for Don Jose’s “Flower Song.” But Don Jose was a murderous abuser with no self-control who blamed Carmen for all of his own mistakes. Like abusers everywhere, his “love” had more to do with possessiveness of the objectified woman than any kind of partnership or actual devotion. Adding insult to injury, until recently, most productions of the opera presented Carmen as a dangerous femme fatale, and Don Jose as the wronged lover, a promising young man (never mind his priors) brought low by her temptation.

Steve Jobs

The (R)evolution of Steve Jobs was a revolutionary opera in a lot of ways. But one thing it didn’t update? The main character is a dick. While some viewers thought the opera went a little too easy on the real man, opera character Steve Jobs was a selfish, self-centered, egotistical man who denied and abandoned his own child, ruled his company like a medieval fiefdom and drove even his best friends away when they dared to disagree with him while always blaming everyone else for his troubles.

Guglielmo and Ferrando in Cosi fan Tutte

I adore Cosi fan Tutte, Mozart’s shallow, frothy mockery of young love. I’ve watched the same production at Seattle Opera twice. But you know what’s a dick move? Making a bet with your best friend and then disguising yourself to test your girlfriends’ loyalty.

And So On

I could go on for another couple hundred years, but I think I’ve made my point. When it comes to gender stereotyping, opera really is just the worst. We excuse individual operas because the men get what they deserve, or because it’s just a comedy and everyone is made to look bad. Primarily, we overlook sexism and the normalization of misogyny because the music is so beautiful.

And honestly, I’m okay with that. Of course, I would love to see more operas with strong female characters and quality men. I am always happy to see stories that don’t fall victim to lazy stereotyping. But I’m also willing to go in with critical eyes wide open and enjoy world class music in the company of stale ideas. It is not only acceptable, but necessary, to view art with eyes that are both appreciative and critical.